April Dreams 2003
Here are the compiled
Dreams Of April In the year 2K3
Below you will find the dreams from this month. For
easier access I have decided to list them all on one page. Depending on how many dreams I
had for the month this page might get kind of long. But the names of each dream should click
you down to the dream.
to Catch up on stuff these days so Hope you will bare with me. I have been
rather busy lately and don't have much time to sleep, much less dream.
The dreams to the left are In
alpha order. They may or may not represent the total of remembered dreams from this month.
The time it takes to scour notebooks will tell.
You can scroll down through all of
the dreams, or select a dream from the list. When your done reading the dream Hit the Back To Top link to return to the list and
select another dream.
By all means if you have any commentary
on any of these dreams, don't hesitate to send me
an e-mail about them. Be sure to get the dream month and name of the dream in the
e-mail so I can reference your comments.
I dreamed I could see foot prints in my back yard in the snow covered ground and as I was trying to figure them out, I saw new foot prints being laid down...but no feet. I followed them for a few steps then I could see the feet and that the feet didn't really belong to something human but something kind of monster looking...more like a big foot type of creature. They lead to the fence where I saw them stop, then pause as it climbed over the fence and continue on. Very bizarre.
Insights and Interpretations:
Monster footprints....I am obviously working on some serious stuff and taking some serious steps to sorting it out. I am tracking through familiar territory but the ground is cold...representing old or frozen emotions. I follow them...searching for the where they come from and where they are going...when I see that it is coming from something invisible....then the feet manifest.
i.e., as I study what is happening with my emotions, I start to see where they have come from (out of nowhere but from the places I have tread in my past)...or what they are coming from. Not a far stretch with dream work. I have come to a block - the fence. But it only pauses and then
climbs over the fence and continues. So the block I am at is only a bench point, sort of...there is more to address on the other side. Subsequent dreams this week have sort of shown me more pieces to this process and it makes more sense almost daily.
Very interesting, very cool!
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|The Great Ketchup Incident
I am in a restaurant. I have pulled cushions up form the table and am looking under it for money, change...I am with two other girlfriends...this behavior doesn't seem odd to any of us at all. About this time, some man is making a commotion near the bar. I have seen the bouncers pick guys up and haul them out just for cussing too loud so I am expecting much the same here. But suddenly, the man picks up a Ketchup bottle and advances quite menacingly toward this woman at a 4-top table, with 3 of her friends. She looks like
someone's mother...quite harmless...blondish...heavy like maybe 50ish in age. He tips up his ketchup bottle and squirts it all over her. Everyone is appalled, the woman is in shock. I get the impression now that this might be her ex-husband. He - Mr. Ketchup - stalks out of the restaurant before anyone has a chance to throw him out. However, I have immediately jumped to my feet and am chasing him through the restaurant screaming at the top of my lungs what a F**king A**hole he is and trying to make sure he hears me...everyone else does and is looking at me...more than him. I follow him all the way outside and am screaming across the parking lot...and saying enough that other people know what he did and I know he can hear me but he is ignoring me. About that time, I decide to give up and return inside the restaurant...and I am laughing and putting my fingers in my ears because I was screaming so loud my ear drums were effected...but I am laughing because I almost couldn't be mad enough to yell at the guy I was yelling at and I was afraid other people could tell that my heart just wasn't in it. I kept thinking, gosh it is really hard to scream at someone like that and mean it for any length of time, because it just feels so fake. I didn't get it.
Next I knew, I was moving into a house with the Mogollon's... lots of them...Barb and Michael, Chani, Ric,
Andy... Pia... myself. All I can remember is that I negotiated the contract for the house...that we were all to share it...and that they had left all the appliances, and somehow we ended up with 2 refrigerators. Someone had helped themselves to my bacon (already) like I
didn't see this coming? Anyway, my bacon was nearly gone...and I started to get irritated and then I thought...you know this is how things go...people just take things for granted here...so if it bugs me, then just don't buy the damn bacon. So there I am, I am going to modify my behavior so I can fit in mentally with the new circumstances and adjust so I don't have a freak out accident - and have to kill somebody!!!! :-)
That's a joke!
Insights and Interpretations:
Huh! Well, there you go. Sometimes I interpret as I dream. This dream seems pretty straight for me.
I am looking for change...nothing new. My girlfriends are experiencing something similar. Some dumb guy, acts like some dumb guy...and I am having to chase him down and tell him so. My heart just isn't into being all that upset about it.
In both sections, I am having to modify my behavior. In the first part, I react the way I am supposed to but I just can't take it all that serious. The second...I have a genuine reaction but it is inappropriate so I understand that I am the one who has to modify my behavior. The characters in the play are really less important because there are so many of them or they are
unidentifiable... so really the main point is that they are reflections of myself. They are showing me my relationship to myself and how I respond in the world more than any other aspect.
Here is an interesting symbology for you. Refrigerator, putting your emotions on ice...cool them. And, there are two - 2 - so it is in relationship to others. And, as I said, since they aren't clear people necessarily...it is more of a reaction to the self as a reflection to my reaction to others.
And, the ketchup is red. Red represents passions, anger, hatred...anything that comes out fast and furious and without much control...that would be a red aspect. And, here I am spewing cuss words - but I just can't maintain the effect because I can't really feel it.
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Ok this is a bit confusing, even for me and I had it.
I am at a pond edge...I am trying to step around the man I am with. (He feels like every man I have ever been in a relationship with...all at the same time...my husband, my exes, etc). He (OR all of them together) is fishing...with many fishing poles. I am just trying to step around him - from the left side, to the right side. It is very difficult and I have to end up moving the fishing poles in some
way...i.e., I go under or over or something. Keep in mind, this is a small pond to begin with.
I am breaking up or divorcing or something here. And even though the male compilation is upset...he lets me go...but the blocking of the way with the fishing poles indicates an unwillingness to let go and even a slight bit of a control issue here. I can feel the sadness in myself as well, and weirdly - it doesn't seem as if I want to walk away forever, only that I have some things that I must take care of and in order for me to do that...I have to break cleanly. Or completely.
I have a son. He is about 6. I want to call him Chris, but have no idea why....He is playing - with friends. I have to leave him as well but he is young and I know that he will barely even notice I am gone. And, I feel like it is actually safer for him to stay with his friends while I am gone. I don't know why it would be unsafe for him with me but it feels like his life will be more stable if I leave him behind with the life he is living, rather than taking him traipsing around the world with me.
I am sorting through old tax forms. I think my mother is helping me. I am trying to gather information on someone...one who I think I might not even have a right to claim an interest in...but I am looking for their information anyway. I have a whole bunch of people showing up on my old taxes that I actually didn't even know I had on there. I can see the names Beth, John, Tom, there might have been a Jules or a Julie...I have like an extra 6 people on my old tax returns that I didn't even know were in there....the one I wanted was the very last one in the stack - John.
There are brief overlaps where I see my In-laws. I have been having a discussion with them. It makes me sad but it is also my past...my history. I feel like I failed many people with my past actions but I didn't have any other choices at the time. I still feel a huge amount of guilt, remorse and responsibility for the broken commitments of my past. (not much of a stretch here actually)
And, there is a part in the middle school at Greenwood, where I am looking for my locker. It is my last year in school and my locker number is 084480. At first, I am like...why can't they just give us the same locker as before so I don't have to look for it every year...but then I realize that the numbers seem familiar and maybe it is the same locker I have always had. I don't remember the combination but it doesn't seem to matter - almost like when I get there, I will remember or something.
Insights and Interpretations:
Ok, weirdness...although this seems right on for me...it feels like I am peeking again into someone
else's life. The names don't make any sense to me at all. The feel and the images of the men are not familiar. I can tell the first male is supposed to be a compilation of all the men of my past but honestly...he feels very little like any of them...which makes me think, that I am someone else reviewing the men that have come through their life. That only makes sense if you are an observer to other peoples lives in some manner, and I seem to do that
a lot with my dream work. But, there are gems in here for me as well.
The fishing pole metaphor...the men are fishing and I am trying to cross from the left to the right...almost like I have played the subservient role as suggested but they always block me when I want to move to a more dominant position. And, it is passive aggressive blocking. They don't actually say no, they just position their poles in front of me so I can't get by.
My son...from an interpretation slant this is a bit confusing...I know very few Chris' so the name has little meaning to me...although I suppose it could be a veiled reference to leaving Christ behind some place safe until I could return...(I was hit by a car when I was 5...so 6 would have been about the right age for me to have had that kind of
separation)...this actually makes quite a bit of sense to me. But now I have to go way back into my history to claim parts...and oddly that is part of what the first section is referencing as well...the review of the history and the reclaiming of specific aspects.
And, I know that I have used Beth and John as names in one of my other dreams as different aspects of myself. They appear here in name only as someone I have put on my taxes in the past. Again, aspects of the self, or people who have taxed me in the past...or even projections of myself that have been taxing to the real me. Interesting aspect of that slant.
I think part of this dream is telling me that if I could take a subservient role and stay on the one side of the fishing poles...the rest of the unfolding would never have to occur but because the male compositions never quite meet the needs of the male aspect, I am constantly having to cross over and pick up those qualities...which in event takes me away from my son...or the Christ-like nature that I have a tendency to lean toward.
It is an important lesson, which is why I am back in school The numbers on my locker mean
a lot too. Zero represents the godforce in the universe...eight represents power, in both the material and the spiritual world...in balance...four represents the physical
manifestation of spirit in the world, it shows in your home, work, family etc. It is balance in the small to the large groups and manifesting from spirit in the small to the large groups. This probably
isn't only clearing stuff for me but for others as well.
I have been having discussions with other friends about the roles male and female take in relationships and why we sometimes have to shift from the subservient to the dominant in a relationship - why and how that occurs. This dream could have been triggered by some of those conversations.
Insights and Interpretations: